Walking With Michael
"Walking With Michael" January 2000 Happy New Year!!!
Hello my friends,
Well, quite a bit is going on. The Connecticut State Supreme Court has ruled
against my Double Jeopardy claim (as we expected). I had another option of
pursuing the appeal to the U.S. Supreme Court, but it would have taken 6-8
months to decide whether or not they would even be willing to hear the appeal. I
am not prepared to wait any longer and directed my attorneys not to
appeal further. On December 21st, Judge Miano called us back to court to meet
with the jury that we picked last spring. Four jurors were dismissed (and two
more might still be dismissed), so in early January we will pick 4 to 6
replacement jurors. Once these jurors are picked the new penalty hearing will
begin. I don't have an exact date yet, but it could start anywhere from the last
week of January to mid-February. For those of you who are on-line and whis to
follow my case, I have two different websites for you to check out-
http://www.ctnow.com and
http://www.newlondonday.com Even
though each website will have articles covering the days of the trial, they will
be written by two different reporters who may have different perspectives. I
don't see things starting before January 24th, but starting then I would check
the websites every week.
I want you to be prepared for the possibility of my being resentenced to death.
Many of you have expressed to me the thought of "How can any jury possibly send
you back to death row?" Do not underestimate the power of emotion on any jury.
The state cannot win on facts alone-their own psychiatric expert admists that I
suffer from a mental illness that is mitigating in nature- so they will try to
enrage the passions of thejury with the horrible facts of the crimes. This is
what they did successfully 12 years ago and they know that it is their best
chance of returning me to death row. I have two very good lawyers who will
represent me to the best of their abilities, but it is an uphill battle and the
truth is that I will be very lucky if I do leave death row. So don't get your
hopes up, my frinds, because chances are that I will be resentenced to death.
Just think about it for a minute from the jury's point of view. They don't know
me as you do, and what they will see is a serial rapist/murder-a man who
brutally raped and murdered eight young women. When they go to the jury room to
deliberate, they will have the pictures of the women who I have murdered; they
will have the crime scene photos of the decomposing bodies; they will have the
autopsy photos of those poor young women; they will remember the testimony of
the parents of these women describing the last days of their lives. And this
will all have been laid out for them in excruciatingly painful detail. Do you
really think that it will matter to them why this all happened? Do you really
think that they will care that I was mentally ill? No. All they will see is
eight brutally murdered women, and the man who must be made to pay for these
crimes. Can you blame them for that? I can't, because if I hadn't experienced
the loss of control associated with my illness for myself, I probably would vote
for death with them. So don't be upset if the jury comes back with the death
penalty, for it will be hard for them not to.
We have a very good jury. We picked some very good people. They are very
intelligent, even-tempered people who I believe will be able to see past all the
emotion and siff out the facts and will come to a fair and just verdict. I have
faith in them. And I am optimistic that I will recieve a life sentence. I just
want you to be aware that even the very best of people can have their judgment
swayed by emotion. So if my jury does come back with the death penalty, don't be
upset with them-they will do their best that they can under very difficult
circumstances. I do not envy their job.
You can help. Many of you wrote letters on my behalf several months ago.
My lawyers and I are looking to update those letters. What do you write? Well,
imagine that you were on the stand in front of the jury, what would you want to
tell them? When and how didyou come to know me? What kind of impact, if any,
have I had on your life? I did some truly horrible thigns, why should the jury
spare my life? In what ways, if any, can I be productive behind perison walls
for the rest of my life? I can't tell you what to write, because for each of you
there are different answers to these questions; different reasons that you think
I should recieve life sentences. Just pretend you are in front of the jury and
tell them what you feel and what you want to them to know about
me. And then send the letter to:
Attorney Karen Goodrow
Capital Defense Unit
Office of the Chief Public Defender
30 Trinity Street-4th floor
Hartford, CA 06106
I want to thank those of you who have sent me money c/o Ann Cole. Once I start
going to court to pick the replacement jurors I will no longer be able to work
my library job and will lose my state pay of $8.75 per week. And if I do get a
life sentence and I'm transfered to a new prison, it will be a while before I
get set up with a job. So for the next several months I am going to really have
to pinch my pennies! So I really appreciate those of you who have sent me money
through Ann.
I want you all to know that I am doing okay, so don't worry about me. I have a
wonderful network of friends-including you, my pen pal friends-all of whom are
really supportive. I have some friends who I can call on the phone when I need
to talk. Here at the prison I have a wonderful mental health social worker who I
can talk to anytime that I need to-and if I need it I can have
anti-anxiety medication available. So I have plenty of support and will not be
going though this alone. Of course, that's not to say that I don't want (or
need) your prayers, for I do and they are welcome. I do have one request in this
regard. If you do pray for me, I ask that you also please pray for the families
of my victims. They are truly the innocent victims here and I regret that I
failed them by not being able to reach some sort of deal to prevent this hearing
from going forward. As wrong as the death penalty is, I would accept it in a
heartbeat is it meant sparing them from the emotional distress at this trial.
I have come across another "nation-wide effort to end prison phone rip-offs." I
don't konw much about themyet-I'm waiting for a reply to my letter for more
information-but I thought that I would share the clipping below with you. Please
share this information with any prison inmates, their families and/or friends
that you know. The more people that get involved with these organizations who
are protesting the high cost of collect calls from prison inmates to their
families the better!! If we all work together we can make a difference!!
So please join us.
"UCAN PRISON PHONE PROJECT"
Join a nation-wide effort to end prison phone rip-offs with UCAN. Send your old
and new phone bills to UCAN. Let us know about your problems with MCI or other
phone companies. Write Utility Consumers Action Network, 1717 Kettner Blvd Suite
105, San Diego CA 92101-2532, (619) 696-6966.
http://www.ucan.org/prisonphones/
I would like to share with you an excerpt from a meditation on "Carrying Out the
Will of the Father" found in In Conversation With God by Francis
Fernandez: "Our Lord will unite us with his prayer: not what I will, Father, but
as thou wilt (Mark 14:36). Not my will but thine be done (Luke 22:42). He even
wants to share with us at times all the sorrow that comes from injustice and
lack of understanding. But he also taught us to obey unto death, even death on a
cross (Phil 2:8). If we are sometimes made to suffer greatly, God will not be
offended by our tears. But we must say at once; Father, thy will be done. There
can be moments in life when heavy blows fall on us, accompanied perhaps by
darkness and deeply-felt anguish and grief, times when God's will is so hard to
accept that we are tempted to discouragement. The sight of Our Lord in the
garden of Gethsemme will show us how to react; we must embrace God's will
unconditionally and without limits of any kind, while we perserve in prayer.
"... "There is a providence behind every happening. Whether we see it or not,
everything is arranged and disposed to serve for the salvation of everyone in
the best way possible. Yes, absolutely everything, whether it occurs in the
general course of the world's events or in the little everyday world of our job
or occupation or family. Everything that happens can and ought to help us to
encounter God, and thus to find peace and serenity of soul: in everythign God
works for the good with those who love him (Rom 8:28)."
This is truly what I need to remember and believe. I figure that I will be
shedding quite a few tears in the coming months and it will be very difficult at
times to trush in God's Proidence. I have been so afraid of this penalty hearing
for 5 1/2 years now (I've been unsentenced since July 1994) and I have done
everything that I could possibly think of to avoid the hearing. It will be
difficult to understand how everything is "arranged and disposed to serve for
the salvation of everyone in the best way possible" when I see the pain in the
faces of the parents and family memebers of my victims. I know that I am
not capable of understanding it, and shouldn't even try, but still it will be
hard to just let go and trust that there is a reason for it all. I just want
this to all be over so that we all can move on. This is a Holy Jubilee year, a
year of special graces of forgiveness, healing and reconciliation. May He bring
them freedom from the past and peace in the future. And may He help me to do
whatever can-if anything at all-to help them in the healing process.
Well that's it for this month. May this Jubilee Year bring you, your family and
your friends great blessings.
MICHAEL B. ROSS 127404
Death Row - Northern CI
PO Box 665
Somers, CT
06071-0665 USA
