Gates Of Heaven-ish Nightmare

Barbie Doll Sex Show Broken Up

More Decline of The West:
Chile Finally Legalizes Divorce

Christina Cancelled Tour Over
Poor Sales?

McDonalds Might Try Smaller
Doorways To Discourage Obesity?

Brad Pitt Has A Small Penis
So Says Brad Pitt ... Pic

We Mormons Are A Lot Like
Buffy The Vampire Slayer...Says Mormon

Outsourcing Humor

Another Fake Abduction Story

Fox News Sues Someone Else

Molestor "Loved" 7 Year Old

Policeman In Fishnet Stockings...

KORN Guy To Direct Porn

Baby Dies In Car
While Stripper Mommie Dozes
After Cocaine, Xanax, Pot,
And "Some Beers"

$6000 Fine For Downloading Music
Anti-RIAA? Go To Eff.Org Today

Pay What You Want Airfare

Sex Offender Busted After His
Flier Advertised "Overnight" Babysitting

Picasso Sets Record At Auction

Cokemon - Super and Best

Fahrenheit 9/11 Heats Up

Guy Trying To Kill Self Also
Kills Young Mother

In Other Suicide News:
Girl Drives Off Cliff...But Lives

Riot, Stripping At Girls Prison
Another Headline I Like Every Part Of

Some People Figured Out That If You
Swiped Your Drivers License At A
Gas Pump Instead Of A Credit Card You
Would Get Free Gas - They Didn't Realize
That The Computer Still Had Their
Identity, However - So They Are Busted

Shot In The Head
For Some Beer, And Some Cash

Woman At Political Rally
Flashes Ben Affleck

More Children Sold Into Slavery
This Time For The Circus

Hiccupping For 44 Years

Theft of 3.5 Million Dollar
Cello Caught On Tape

Beauty Is Indeed Skin Deep

Texan Does Abortion The Hard Way

Director To Use Auction Winners
As Actors

Ex-Enron Exec Ordered To Stay Sober

Former Oregon Governor
Had Sex With 14 Year Old Girl

Missing Girl Was In Police
Custody All Along
Or At Least Her Bones Were

Ex-Wife Makes A Scene At
Ex-Hubby's New Marriage

Convicted:
He Kept His Sex Slave
For 14 Years,
Made Her Do Nude Cartwheels

Huge Settlement For Employee
Whose Boss Walked Around
In A Towel

TV News Copter Crashes
Luckily Another Copter From
Another Station Can Cover That
Terrific Story

For Best Crybaby, The Winner Is...

Falling In Love Makes
Women Like Men,
Men More Like Women

14 Year Old Girl Beaten
Unconscious At Dance By Other Girls

Woman Flees Scene of Hit And Run
Dies In Second Crash

Brad Says He Didn't Do Angelina
World Asks Why Not?!

Man Tried To Electrocute Wife
In The Bathtub

School Bus Brake Lines Cut By Vandals

The Fatal Belly Flop

69 Year Old Punches, Kills 74 Year Old

More Porn Stars With AIDS

The Photos: Iraq And A Hard Place